Ever since Jack was born or possibly even before
then, I’ve had the habit of telling John, “it’s no longer about you”.
then, I’ve had the habit of telling John, “it’s no longer about you”.
When I was pregnant it was about me or more
likely me and the baby I was carrying.
It was all about how I felt and what I needed.
likely me and the baby I was carrying.
It was all about how I felt and what I needed.
Then Jack was born and it was all about Jack. It
wasn’t about John or Bailey or even me, everything was about Jack.
wasn’t about John or Bailey or even me, everything was about Jack.
And there were lots of times that I would have to
remind John of this. Like when he wanted to go camping for 4 nights and leave
me with a colicky 1 month old.
remind John of this. Like when he wanted to go camping for 4 nights and leave
me with a colicky 1 month old.
Or when would want to lay in bed on a Sunday
after I had been up all night with the baby. Or the numerous times when our
plans got shifted around because Jack needed a nap.
after I had been up all night with the baby. Or the numerous times when our
plans got shifted around because Jack needed a nap.
All too many times I found myself saying, “it’s
not about you anymore”. At one point it was so bad that my father in law said
to me, “tell John it’s not about him anymore”.
not about you anymore”. At one point it was so bad that my father in law said
to me, “tell John it’s not about him anymore”.
And it John’s defense he hadn’t carried a baby
for 9 months. He wasn’t already adjusted to the idea that his life was no
longer his.
for 9 months. He wasn’t already adjusted to the idea that his life was no
longer his.
As moms we get thrown right in. A positive pregnancy test and
suddenly your life isn’t your own anymore, suddenly it’s not about you.
suddenly your life isn’t your own anymore, suddenly it’s not about you.
So at Christmas I decided it was time for it to
be about John again, even if just for one day. I got him tickets to
Philadelphia Comic Convention and in June we spent the night in Philly and went
to the convention.
be about John again, even if just for one day. I got him tickets to
Philadelphia Comic Convention and in June we spent the night in Philly and went
to the convention.
Dressed in my best comic gear we browsed rows and
rows of comics. Listened to Bruce Campbell talk about Army of Darkness and
Living Dead. We went to a Star Trek captains reunion. And through it all I kept
a smile on my face, even when William Shatner talked for 15 minutes about his
love of horses.
rows of comics. Listened to Bruce Campbell talk about Army of Darkness and
Living Dead. We went to a Star Trek captains reunion. And through it all I kept
a smile on my face, even when William Shatner talked for 15 minutes about his
love of horses.
Because that day wasn’t about me, it for once was
all about John.
all about John.
What do you do when you need to do something for yourself or your spouse that isn’t all about the kids?
Aw, I love this! It's true, life does become a lot about the child (or children) but yes, it is good to make it all about you once in a while too! 🙂
That's awesome I bet he loved it. My husband is a huge fan of surfing so I have always been supportive of him doing that. Now that the kids are older he loves taking them too and getting them up on the board.
I love that you did this for him! I try to give my husband time to go bike riding or kayaking. He loves to do them but he has such a busy work schedule that he feels guilty leaving in the evening to go do them after barely being here during the week. I know he needs his downtime too, so I make plans with my girls so he doesn't feel guilty. It is a win win for all of us. We're all happier when we know the people we love are happier.