When I Can’t Do It All

I’m running late. I underestimated the amount of time that grocery shopping would take as usual. I bring the bags in and quickly open my lap top and log in for work while I throw the frozen items in the freezer, the others can wait. And I look around the kitchen and the coffee that I made 2 hours ago sits in the pot, thankfully still hot. Yesterday’s after school project still sits on the kitchen table, a box of crayons and coloring sheets mixing with leftover breakfast dishes. The floor needs to be swept and the dishes are overflowing in the sink. There is vacuuming that needs to be done and the laundry, well that never ends.

When I Can’t Do It All, I do what matters most.

I’m drowning at work. I took on too much, I’m not doing enough and my heart just isn’t in it. And yet I sit down every day and do my job as best I can. And these hours of working at home aren’t flexible.

Our schedule is packed and I find myself desperately hoping plans will be canceled. There are friends I haven’t seen and friends I need to follow up with who’s lives are complicated and I feel I should be doing more.

There are my parents and my in-laws and the MOMs Club that I’m president of, there are school parties that need attention and bills that need paying. There is a to-do list that keeps piling higher and higher. And there are only so many hours in the day. I can’t do it all, it’s just not possible.

So when I can’t do it all I do what matters. I hug my son, I plan a day out, I log out of work on time and take him to a play date. I curl up on the couch and watch Mickey’s Monster Musical. I pull out the crayons and color a picture. We go to the library or the park. Because at the end of the day the dishes can sit, the work will or won’t get done, and the other stuff will (I hope) fall into place. But this time with him is fleeting and of all these things it’s the one that matters most.