I was very comfortable as a mom to one kid. I had that routine down, I was good at it. And even on days when I wasn’t I knew how to reboot, recharge and make tomorrow better. With one kid there is only one small persons problems to solve, only one person who needs your attention, and only one person demanding to be fed. Having two kids changes all of that, it doubles and divides everything. We are a little over 4 months into having two kids and I’ve come to learn a few things.
What Having Two Kids Means:
It takes you twice as long to get out the door, and that the number of things needed and forgotten is doubled.
That bedtime is more like a circus juggling act of who needs a bath and what story to read and did you brush your teeth.
It means me muttering “just go to sleep” over and over again.
It’s extra hugs and kisses and my heart feeling full and exhausted all at once.
It’s the sound of two noise machines running, so that your house sounds like it’s constantly raining after 8pm.
It’s holding your breath before bed wondering if you will get to sleep through the night.
It’s the likely hood that one child might wake up the other child.
There’s a lot of shushing and keep your voice down and for the love of god don’t you know what an inside voice is.
It’s wishing they both napped.
It’s having less time to myself but feeling like I need double the amount of time to recharge.
That some days one will have to do what is best for the other one.
That the baby will miss a nap to take the older one on a play date.
That even when the older one is playing you still have to occupy the younger one, and that play dates are no longer, “go play with your friend while Mom chats and sips coffee” .
It’s determining who’s needs need to be taken care of first, even though they both want what they want, RIGHT NOW.
It’s when you buy something for one having to buy something for the other, even though that doesn’t really sit well with you.
It’s constantly wondering how people with more than two kids did it.
It’s realizing how easy you had it when you had one. Though you would never imply that having one kid is easy.
It’s double the toys and the mess and the tears. But it’s also double the hugs, cuddles, kisses, smiles and “I love you moms”.
It’s watching your older one grow up just a bit, because that’s what being a big brother is about.
It’s the pride he takes in being a big brother, that makes you so proud and grateful.
It’s playtime and laughter and “Mom, I just love her, so much”.
It’s watching the baby light up every time her brother speaks.
It’s exhausting and it’s wonderful. It’s trying to copy the magic of a day when you feel like you are rocking being a mom of two and it’s wanting to sweep away the days when you are short on sleep and patience. It’s love, so much love, that heart exploding kind of love that, doesn’t double but grows exponentially when you have two kids.
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