Two weeks ago, Jack had a runny nose and a slight fever. But otherwise he seemed fine. My gut reaction was that he had a cold and that it would pass.
I was talking to my MIL and said, “I don’t think I’m going to take him to the doctor, he seems fine and I don’t want him to catch anything worse while there” and she agreed with me.
The next day (Saturday) he was a bit run down but the fever was gone, it was just a cold.
On Sunday he seemed a lot better with the exception of a runny nose. I was doing the saline spray and the aspirator and the cool mist humidifier. Everything I could to help him.
My MIL stayed with Jack on Sunday so the hubs and I could go see Beauty and the Beast in 3D and get some dinner. When we got home my MIL said, “he coughed once it sounded like croup and he tugged his ear once he could have an ear infection and the congestion could lead to a sinus infection”.
I agreed to call the doctor in the morning but when I looked at Jack and played with Jack he seemed fine just a little sniffy.
But all that night I felt horrible. What if I had made the wrong decision? What if he had something serious? What if I had missed something?
Jack slept as usual and in the morning seemed even better. Still congested but better. I stuck with my gut and didn’t call the doctor.
Every time my in-laws called I said, “no he’s not coughing or pulling his ear, he’s a little congested but he’s sitting here happily playing”.
And after I said those words I silently prayed that it would hold true. That I was right. That it wouldn’t get worse and end up being croup or an ear infection. And it did, the cold passed. My gut was right.
Why a year into this mom gig am I still so insecure about making these decisions? Why can’t I just trust myself with out feeling guilty or like I’ve made a mistake?
I’ve never been very good at going with my gut, because I’m afraid my gut is wrong.
My gut tells me that I need more information than it can provide me. My gut tells me I could make mistakes. My gut tells me that raising Jack is uncharted territory, that no one before or after me will raise this little boy. My gut tells me to second guess and double check and dig deeper because I need to make the right decisions.
And every now and then my heart speaks up and tells me not to be so hard on myself. That some days just wanting to do my best is enough.
Do you trust your gut? Are you always second guessing yourself?
marie says
I usually go with my gut & I don't second guess myself. That said my kids are rarely sick and when they are I consult with my mom. She raised 9 kids and is such a great resource. I am lucky to have her.
Julia Hunter says
9 kids wow your mom must have seen it all, what a wonderful resource to have.
Deb says
I usually go with my gut — but it took me awhile to get there. My kids are 3 and almost 6 now and I used to worry about my decisions all the time. Your gut is usually right…you're his mom and you know him best. It does get easier as they get older though.
Julia Hunter says
Thank you. I think I am definitely getting better about going with my gut as he's gotten older.
Where is the ME in Mommy? says
I go with my gut. I learned early on that there are exactly TWO experts on how to raise my kids and my husband is the other one. When I do have questions, though, I'm quick to ask my mom friends who are going through it now (as opposed to MIL whose baby is 28 …)
Thanks for stopping by my blog today!
Julia Hunter says
So true mom and dad are the experts when it comes to their kids. I think sometimes my MIL forgets that her baby is 30, lol.
Renegades says
It's hard to know what to do I think. My Renegades are 11 and 10 and I still second guess myself on when we need a doctor and when it's just a cold or flu.
Julia Hunter says
It is hard to know especially with colds. I always wonder if it's going to get worse.
Ashley - My Front Porch Swing says
It's so hard to not second-guess, especially if others are doing it to you! But, they do call it mother's intuition, so it must count for something, right??
Julia Hunter says
Yes it's the hardest part when someone is second guessing me.
Heather says
I go with my gut, but still second guess myself and my kids are 12, 10, and 5. For me it is never-ending. Good luck momma! You are doing okay!
Julia Hunter says
I'm a second guesser, I think that is my problem. Thank you!
My Inner Chick says
Yes. I do now.
Usually if one goes w/ one's gut, she is Always right 🙂
XX
Julia Hunter says
Thanks, I'm going to try to remember that.
Helene says
Oh gosh, this is a hard question to answer because I tend to be indecisive person as it is. For the most part, I trust my gut when it comes to my kids but I do find myself second guessing myself constantly and in the end I'm happy I went with my gut.
Julia Hunter says
I'm indecisive too so I think that's half my problem.
Emily says
Trust yourself! It sounds like you have good instincts!
Julia Hunter says
Thank you, I'm trying to get there.
Shell says
Oh, this is so hard! I tend to wait… and then thing what if it's something worse? I drive myself crazy with the back ad forth!
Julia Hunter says
I do the same thing!
Kristi says
I tend to trust my gut but I still rely on the wisdom of those who have went before! haha
Now that I have teenagers and one that is quickly approching the end of his teens I have the benefit of hindsight. That feeling that I sometimes get that something is just "off" has really paid off. I have had some insights into the kids that have shocked even them! They think I have an informant somewhere but noooo…it's just my gut! 🙂
You sound like you have awesome insight because you are so connected to your little guy. The second guessing will always be a part of motherhood but continue to trust yourself!
Julia Hunter says
Thanks for the support! That's great that you have such insight into your kids that you even shock them.