Last week John and I went on our first solo vacation in a decade. We booked the trip when I was still pregnant with Grace. I made John, buy travel insurance because I wasn’t certain I would want to go away without her. We had left Jackson with my parents at 7 months old to go to my SIL wedding in Seattle, but I still had reservations about leaving both kids for 5 days. But last Sunday we boarded a plane to Miami and I left all of my reservations about leaving the kids in New Jersey. Well I mostly left them behind.
Thoughts I Had When Vacationing Without Kids
In the days before we left
OMG! I can’t believe our vacation is 4 weeks away, I need a break.
OMG! I can’t believe our vacation is 4 weeks away, how am I supposed to leave my babies.
I can’t go on vacation I don’t fit in any of my summer clothes.
I’m buying a new wardrobe, budget be damned.
How am I supposed to pack two, kids, a dog, myself and my husband for vacation. Mom ain’t got time for that.
The husband can pack himself.
The five-year old can pack himself.
I’ll pack me and the baby.
God these baby clothes are so cute, and damn she is growing up so fast. How can I leave her for five days, she will grow up even more and forget about me.
But I’ll sleep through the night.
What if the plane crashes or the ship sinks or…. what if I never see my kids again.
Can’t live life in fear, planes crash, ships sink… you probably shouldn’t have started reading Wreckage.
Maybe it was nuts to leave instructions and a list of emergency contacts with the grandparents, they got this.
During the Trip
OMG! We have no kids, no kids for 5 days! Somebody order me a mimosa or 20.
Maybe we should just stay home and nap for 5 days.
I hate flying, I hate flying, I hate flying.
I miss my babies. (Spend 20 minutes of flight looking at pictures of kids on phone). Repeat this on the return trip while muttering “please let me see my babies” as plane takes off during a thunderstorm.
Oh sunshine, palm trees and freedom, how I’ve missed you.
How am I away from my kids and I’m still exhausted and in bed by 9.
10 hours of uninterrupted sleep is heaven.
I should probably call the kids.
Maybe just a text, maybe I’ll wait till after breakfast, hell I’m calling them.
I should remind the grandparents I will be out of cell service the next two days.
Maybe I should just buy the internet package.
Oh look it’s not even noon and I’m on my second sangria.
Vacation is wonderful.
But I miss my kids.
And I totally need this, I deserve this.
Maybe one more specialty cocktail.
God I miss the babies chubby cheeks and the five year olds hugs. What if her teeth come in while I’m gone. What if he grows up just a little more.
Oh look a floating bar.
And reggae music
Yes, I’ll have another one.
Oh this water is so blue and warm and the beach is so gorgeous.
Well maybe just one more margarita.
Kids? Yes I have kids, now let’s have a nap in a hammock.